PROTECTING THE MARRIAGE BED
The world is shouting “SEX”. Its all over the television, at the movies, in magazines, plastered on billboards, in music lyrics, and all over the internet. Many women are escaping into a fantasy world by reading erotica novels, with the mindset that “this is just a novel”. So, where does all of this lead? This leads us, this deceives us, into thinking that we can cross certain lines without any danger. The downward spiral of sexual sin often begins to take place before we even realize that we have entered into this very dark world. Boundary lines are often blurred because of our modern day sexualized culture.
Growing up in the church, and coming to know the Lord when I was only fourteen years old, I never thought that I would be a statistic concerning divorce. I married my high school sweetheart and we were both Christians but we divorced almost eleven years later. The first years of our marriage were great. I thought everything was fine until my husband started asking me to do certain sexual activities in our marriage bed. I protested, telling him that we were Christians and we should not do these things. He continually insisted that the marriage bed is undefiled, and what him and I did as a married couple was not sin, as long as him and I agreed upon it. As the months passed, he continued to pressure me and I finally gave into this pressure. I began to do sexual activities in my marriage bed that I was not comfortable in doing. I had no idea of the door that I opened up and I had no idea of the downward spiral of sexual sin that awaited me. I learned quickly that as you feed the flesh, it has the capability of growing immensely. My spirit within me began to slowly die and my flesh began to quickly thrive.
Before I continue on with my story, some may think that this article is offensive. Some may think that Christians should not speak of such things, and you see, to me, that is where one major problem arises – many Christians prefer that we do not speak about “sex”; it is a private matter. Sex plays a very major role in the marriage relationship and I personally believe that the church needs to be more open with this topic. When these events began to take place in my marriage I felt as though I could not go and speak with anyone in the church about sex, because I never heard anyone talk about sex inside the walls of the church, other than the fact that you were not suppose to have sex until you were married. And I believe since I was never taught about protecting the marriage bed and keeping it pure, I was deceived into thinking that my husband and I could do as we pleased, since after all, we were married.
This man that I was married to, this man that I loved dearly, wanted to start playing around with fantasies in our marriage bed and I finally submitted. Speaking fantasies to one another in the marriage bed turned into watching fantasies, which is what pornography is. The images of pornography began to take over my mind and I turned into someone that I never imagined. I did not even know that it was possible to have sinful sex in the marriage bed because I never heard of such a thing, but my marriage was a testament to that. Sin grows like yeast, and as my husband and I watched pornography together, as we watched perversion taking place right in front of our eyes, our minds soon became perverted also. No longer was ‘watching’ pornography enough for our flesh; it hungered for more. My husband then made it a point that our fantasy role playing would turn into actual reality.
As you can imagine, my marriage fell apart and my life fell apart. I traveled to the edge of hell and dangled my feet in it, and through it all, Jesus Christ never left my side. He was with me in my sin. He forgave me. He restored me. He completely healed my mind and set me free from this addiction, through His word.
I know that I am not the only Christian woman that ever submitted to her husband and began to speak fantasies into the marriage bed. I know that I am not the only Christian woman that ever submitted to her husband and began to watch pornography in the marriage bed. I know that Christian marriages are pushing the boundary lines in their marriage bed and I pray that they will take heed to these words – Do sex God’s way! The world’s way never satisfies; it leaves you empty and destroyed. Couples, you need to protect your marriage bed and keep it pure. In the New King James Version it does say in Hebrews 13:4 “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled….” now listen to the New International Version “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” God created man and woman, and in His creativity He equipped a man to please a woman, and He equipped a woman to please a man. Married couples do not need to add any other type of stimulant to their sexual relationship other than their own bodies. When you keep sex pure in your marriage, you keep sex powerful in your marriage!
KEEPING IT PURE
Many women believe that they need to spice things up in their sex life. Many women believe that something is missing in their marriage bed and they need to try new things to make their sex life more exciting; these thoughts and desires are leading women to venture into a fantasy world. There are also many men asking their lovers to play fantasy games, and watch pornography with them.
What happens when you open that door to the fantasy world? What happens when fantasies turn into reality? ‘Fulfilling Love – From Sin to Surrender’ is a true story of a woman traveling down a road filled with fantasies in her marriage bed. Stacey Lynn was tricked and deceived in her way of thinking, and she believed the lie that the world was telling her.
What, at first, did seem to spice things up, soon brought this woman to a place that she never expected to travel to. The dark sexual world led her to the edge of hell, but she was not there all alone. There was a man that traveled with her; He never left her side.
Stacey Lynn takes you on her journey, and she introduces you to this Man that saved her life, and gave her the strength to rise up out of the ashes.
FULFILLING LOVE AND FIFTY SHADES OF GREY
The Good News, a South Florida Christian newspaper published this article and used quotes from Stacey Lynn, and also mentioned ‘Fulfilling Love – From Sin to Surrender’. goodnewsfl.org/thinking-50-shades-grey/
March 18, 2014 article The Christian Post – ‘Are churches to blame for christian women turning to pornographic books like ‘fifty shades of grey’? by Nicola Menzie……..
The authors of Pulling Back the Shades: Erotica, Intimacy, and the Longings of a Woman’s Heart, meant to serve as a corrective to the wildly popular Fifty Shades series, believe one reason erotica has found a home among Christian women is because they are simply starved for Bible-based teaching and open dialogue on sexuality in their communities of faith.
Quote from Dr. Juli Slattery: One of the reasons why so many Christian women are reading Fifty Shades of Grey is because there hasn’t been good teaching coming from Christian sources on sexuality, so they just go to the world without having that discernment. Why is that? I think people falsely make the assumption that because sex is private, the conversations about sex should be private. In other words, you can teach about sexuality, the “Song of Solomon” teaches about sexuality and there are many places in scripture that mention sexuality, without sharing privately what happens between a particular husband and wife.
“Barna Group researchers revealed in the results of a survey published last year that “there is no difference between the percentage of Christians who have read Fifty Shades of Grey and the percentage of all Americans who have read the book.”
Women also accounted for a significant portion of the readership of 50 Shades of Grey, which turned dubious critical response into one of 2012’s biggest publishing success stories. The book with explicit sexual content trends higher among older readers, with one in ten of both Busters (29-47 year-olds) and Boomers (48-66) who say they’ve read the book. The same proportion of practicing Christians (9%) have read 50 Shades as among American adults (9%).